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for the week of September 1, 2010

by Eloise Campanella

 

 

I know all my readers must be deeply concerned for the folks stuck in the massive traffic jam in China that I reported in last issue of the Bull.  Good news.  According to an article on August 25th from MSN:  "Can a monster traffic jam spanning dozens of miles and leaving drivers stuck for days really disappear overnight?...  The bottleneck on the Beijing-Tibet expressway, which began on August 14 due to a spike in traffic by cargo-bearing heavy trucks and was compounded by road maintenance works... seems to have vanished."  No further explanation was given for the better than 10 day epic pile-up disappearance.  Me?  I think it was mass alien abduction. 

 

 

I'd like to say that "fall is in the air" but actually it's only on the calendar.  It may be September 1st but it still feels like July 1st.  Soon enough, I'm sure.   However the white shoes will get packed away this weekend. 

 

 

 

AT THE DETENTION CENTER…

 

Inmate was found with a sharpened toothbrush in his cell and given a "flexible" one.  I need to see that because the picture I have in my head of that implement wouldn't be conducive to brushing teeth. 

 

Two inmates were brought to Booking for being involved in an altercation.  Then two more were brought in for the same reason, different fight.  Deputies then reported that during that same shift, all new arrestees but one were bought in as a uncooperative.

 

A mentally challenged inmate was screaming because, he said, that chemicals were coming through the air vent and closing off his airway.  A kind deputy spoke with him for awhile and the inmate forgot about the problem.  These guys are good.

 

Deputy heard an inmate say that he was going to go outside and refuse to come back in.  So the deputy asked him why he felt that way.  He then told the deputy that he hated it in jail and was upset about getting a new charge.  Deputy told inmate to feel free to let a deputy know if he needed to talk or vent about his concerns and emotional well-being.  Good, huh?

 

A new inmate has a criminal record including Advocating Facility Disruption at the DOC.  He was made a Red Tag.

 

As part of a management plan for a mentally challenged inmate, he has been approved to be tutored for his GED.   Expectations were made clear to him including the fact that this program will be based on his behavior remaining appropriate during the sessions in the library as well as in the housing area.

 

One inmate slapped the other.  When the slapper was asked about the incident, he said it was just horseplay.  Guess it was more because they were both taken to Booking and are pending sanction.

 

Inmate attempted to send a letter to a person who has a restraining order on him.  He used his old cellmate's name.  Investigation continues.

 

Subject came for a visit; however she had a warrant out of Weld County for which she was booked.  Her 10-year-old son was picked up by Child Protective Services until her family could pick him up.

 

Deputies noted an inmate was very upset over how her family is treating her.  The deputy spent a good portion of the evening talking with her.  She did calm down.  Like I said earlier, these folks are good. 

 

 

 

ON PATROL…    

 

Subject reported his 18-year-old son pushed him down and threw a picture frame inside the house.  Once outside, he threw a wrought iron bench and dented both passenger side doors of Dad's SUV.  So far he has not been located but he will be.

 

A large amount of copper wire was taken from a padlocked business on a county road in Loveland.

 

Sears.com fraud unit caught a charge for $800 for four Nanos.  Subject was grateful and not out any money.  The card is cancelled.

 

Subject reported his fence had been spray-painted with silver paint.  Deputies believe it is gang-related.

 

A soon-to-be ex-wife took out a credit card in husband's name before their separation which is now maxed out at $10,000.  She says she'll pay it back.  Yep, pay it back. 

 

Foster parents found a baggie of marijuana in their 14-year-old's backpack.  The parents requested he be given a summons.  We did.

 

A 77-year-old asked a group having a party with a live band to turn down the music.  Subject was issued a summons for Harassment as the subject pushed the senior down to the ground.  Nothing noted about the music after that. 

 

Subject reported an unknown person in his home.  Turns out it was a boyfriend of subject's 16-year-old daughter.  Over the phone he admitted to being there and he will be contacted at a later date. 

 

              

 

Suspect assaulted a bar patron by biting his cheek and causing an injury.  (Biting his cheek!)  Suspect then got into his car and drove recklessly by running over another patron's shoe and peeling out of the parking lot.  Numerous bar patrons threw rocks at the car as it fled,  breaking his window.  He crashed into a small boulder in the parking lot destroying the engine.  He was identified by many including a security guard.  He failed roadsides and was arrested.  Two others were cited for disorderly conduct for throwing the rocks and causing a 20-person disturbance.  What else can I add?

 

Subject was contacted for a traffic offense.  He had a loaded .357 under some clothing on the seat.  He was arrested for DUI and Prohibited Use of a Weapon.

 

On August 29th subject reported his 13-year-old daughter was missing.  He hadn't seen her since August 24th.

 

Deputies responded to multiple bear calls.  A mama and two cubs were in the area of Falls Court and Kennedy in Loveland.  Deputies reported the bears were not aggressive at that time but people keep trying to get closer to them.  When I was a Reserve Deputy, my field training officer and I had a bear call in south Fort Collins.  That was the first time I heard the phrase, "Send in the throw-down deputy!"

 

Subject reported that the headlight and the entire assembly was taken from her minivan.  Well I guess that's one way.  Personally I prefer to buy my parts.

 

Deputies responded to a report of a burglary in progress.  Subject stated that her ex-boyfriend had kicked in the door and entered her home.  He fled.  Deputy searched the area and found a large hold in the side of the house.  Our very thin sergeant crawled through the hole to let the other deputies in the door and after a search of the residence, found the suspect hiding in a closet.   While placing the suspect in the patrol vehicle, he became uncooperative and began to kick deputy and sergeant.  After a lengthy struggle, he was secured.  He was transported to PVH for a minor injuries.  Deputies were also treated at PVH and released.  He was booked for 1st Deg Burglary/ 2nd Deg Burglary/ Stalking/ 2nd Deg Assault on a Peace Officer X 2/ 3rd Deg Assault on a Peace Officer/ Obstructing a Peace Officer /Criminal Mischief/ and Domestic Violence and a partridge in a pear tree.  Nice job on what I hear was a textbook building search.

 

Our midnight shift sergeant reported that three out of four nights they had to call the dayshift in early because of the meager staffing and high volume of calls.  They said the pagers went off and the beauty sleep was cut short.  One swing shift deputy stayed late until days could come in.

 

We seem to have had a rash, so to speak, of indecent exposures this past week.  A male exposed himself to a female who was panhandling near Mulberry and I-25.   As he was propositioning her, among other things, she got a good vehicle description and plate number.  Investigation continues. 

 

Subject reported a car pulled up to her while she was walking on the street and the occupant committed a lewd act in her view.  Deputy found this guy who was also driving under restraint.  He was booked.

 

Investigation continues on yet another Indecent Exposure in Loveland.    

 

 

Our Criminal Impact Unit reported that some of the unit spent three days at the Colorado Drug Investigators Association (CDIA) annual conference.  They said much of the training this year was centered around the medical marijuana debacle.  One member of the unit will participate on a board with CDIA to address future concerns.  CIU thanked the Larimer County Commissioners who lent a big had in deciding to ban MJ dispensaries in unincorporated Larimer County. 

 

Sex offender addresses and registrations continue to be checked.  It's kind of like painting the San Francisco Bay Bridge.  Get to one side and start all over at the other side.  Our folks are never through checking on sex offenders. 

 

I noticed that our folks have arrested 61 people on outstanding warrants this month.  Good job.

 

 

 

MISCELLANEOUS…

 

The following is silly but fun.  Forgive me. 

Dear Tide: 

I am writing to say what an excellent product you have.  I've used it all of my married life, as my Mom always told me it was the best.

Now that I am in my fifties I find it even better!  In fact, about a month ago, I spilled some red wine on my new white blouse.  My inconsiderate and uncaring husband started to belittle me about how clumsy I was, and generally started becoming a pain in the neck.

One thing led to another and somehow I ended up with his blood on my new white blouse!  I grabbed my bottle of Tide with bleach alternative, and, to my surprise and satisfaction, all of the stains came out!  In fact, the stains came out so well the detectives who came by yesterday told me that the DNA tests on my blouse were negative and then my attorney called and said that I was no longer considered a suspect in the disappearance of my husband.

What a relief!  Going through menopause is bad enough without being a murder suspect!  I thank you, once again, for having a great product.

Well, gotta go, have to write to the Hefty bag people.

Sincerely,

Emma

 

 

 

Until next week, that's all she wrote.